fredag 11 november 2016

Secrets

I've talked about secrets, my secrets, a few times before. Some of those secrets are kept untold, hidden in dark places within my heart. Never ment to see the light of day, ever again. Following me to my grave.  Others I've let go off and told to a few, carefully selected friends and family. Being brave and trying to eliminate the dark spots in my heart.

Most of my secrets I have chained to my heart out of fear. But I'm not afraid of the secret in itself, not all at least, I could probably live with them being out in the open. But I fear how knowing those secret would effect the way people act around me, and maybe the way they feel about me. Does that make any sense at all? 
 
This is what I don't want to see happening; I don't want you to think any less of me. I don't want you to pity me. I don't want you to fear me. I don't want you to be afraid of hurting me. I don't want you to feel sorry for me. I don't want you to feel unsure of how to act around me. I don't want you to change!!! I want you to love/like me just as you did - before knowing. I'm still the same person you knew weeks, months and years back. 

My secrets may (most definitely) have contributed to me being where I am today, to whom I've become, but they do not define me, not anymore, although they might have once. They are really just reminders of what once happened, to me, and for the most part I try to view them as lessons. Lessons of life. Some I learn from others I do not. 

So, some secrets I choose to keep hidden, because I fear the world changing around me if I let them out of their chains. Others I let go off. And if I open my door to let you inside, please don't change!

Laters babes!

Over and out
Pusspuss 

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